Not about babies.

(But really, what else do I take photos of? Hello! from West & Quinn, who is obviously giving us the most genuine of smiles. I mean seriously, he looks totally, thoroughly insane. Sweet boy.)

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I am a child of the 90's.

I wore oversized flannel, had long hair parted down the middle (#oopsstilldo) & owned several paris of DocMartens. Internet friends, I promise you that it was not pretty.

It probably all started that one day at my friend's house in 5th or 6th grade when we found one of her dad's new CDs & put it in the stereo, turning it way up. It sounded like something we probably shouldn't be listening to, had some words that made us giggle, & we loved it (Pearl Jam's first album, Ten).

And then there was the fact that I really just wanted to be friends with my older brother. He was in high school & I was barely in junior high. His friends were of course the hottest & the coolest, & with the arrival of Kurt Kobain & Chris Cornell & Eddie Vedder, grunge was in. They were all obessed with Pearl Jam, so of course - me too, me too, me too! 

My frien Alex Romney gave me their third alumb, Vitology, at my 7th grade birthday party. It was a tape, but Alex played the guitar & sang & knew all of the words already, so of course I listented even though a few of the songs scared me a little bit.  I remember sitting on the steps after school waiting for our busses & trying to figure out three part harmony for Better Man with my choir friends. 

#nerdalert

I've had a big + loyal love for Pearl Jam since my early teenage years. In 1996, I saw them at Key Arena in Seattle & I crowd surfed (!!). Looking back 15+ years later, I'm not quite certain why my mother let me go with my brother & his friends - nor do I understand why he let me go, actually - but it was seriously so much fun (as was roadtripping to other concerts - seeing them in Montana, Park City, & Connecticut a few years ago). Happy memories + minimal hearing loss. 

Mike surprised me with tickets last year for a solo Eddie Vedder show for the spring - one that was subsequently cancelled & rescheduled for this fall. With a newborn, we didn't know if we'd make it, but I put on my big girl panties, had our trusty sitter come over (who had never heard of Pearl Jam), & knew that all of the bags of frozen milk in our freezer would prevent any major catastrophe from occuring. 

(But still - I was so nervous to leave West. I'm fairly certain I didn't leave Quinn with anyone but my mom for months.)

We went & got sushi downtown beforehand (gluten & dairy free - I always knew it was the perfect food), & walked over to Jones Hall - a really beautiful venue where the Houston Symphony performs. When we walked in I knew it was going to be a different kind of show than what I was used to. It was quiet. Everyone was seated. And we were amongst the youngest people there. 

It was immediately magical. Glen Hansard opened & he reminded me how much I love music. It makes me feel things, & that man alone on a stage with a guitar - !!. I feel like the show was as much about him as it was Eddie Vedder - who sat on the stage with his ukulele, told stories (favorite: living in Houston & getting attacked by fire ants at age 2), & sang really beautiful songs. I'm not used to Vedder + Beautiful together in any sort of description. It was amazing.

He said something during the show - that when we all first started our relationship, all of their songs were angry. And then he said, Look around! Look how well we're all doing now! Look how far we've come! That made my heart warm, especially since it was probably the first time I'd ever seen him perform sober. Bless his heart, he's a changed man - He even understood that a good crowd-sing is good for the soul. I loved hearing him just with a single instrument, encouraging all of us to sing along to stripped down versions of the songs that colored my adolescence.

I love being a mama, & I've chosen to do what I do, but really - that night was a good reminder that it's okay to have extracurriculars, even in this phase of lif. And sometimes, it's a really good thing to drive 45 minutes in the opposite direction as your children.