Jul 17, 2009

Things I do when my wife is traveling - DAY 3:

  • Take low budget pics with my iPhone because ‘our’ camera is somewhere in Northern Idaho.
  • Survive on supplements and air dry my 10x reused protein cup. Why get a new cup when a simple rinse will do? And why use a towel to dry when you can just let nature take its course for a few hours?

  • Chip away at week-old stale brownies. The ultimate pick-me-up between protein shots.

  • Not put things away. The kitchen scale and blender at the bottom of the frame have been in the same spot in the middle of the kitchen floor for 48 hours. And don’t even think that peanut butter is going to be set right side up!

  • Blog even though I know only females read the entries on Mormon blogs. Or at least those are the only people who will admit to reading the entries. Men occasionally read Mormon blogs, just like they occasionally flip through Cosmo or US Weekly when in line at the grocery store. Then when their wives / GF’s say “OMG did you know so and so broke up with what’s his face,” they know exactly what they’re talking about, but play it cool and say “why would I possibly know that?” but totally know and just don’t want to lose their man card.
  • Sleep sprawled across the bed. I’ve concluded that my preferred body position somewhat resembles a swastika (arms and legs bent and stretched at similar angles). I considered drawing a diagram for you in MS Paint (yes, MS Paint, because ‘our’ Mac is also in Northern Idaho and I am thus relegated to my vintage work laptop), but decided against that. We’ve made a concerted effort to keep the anti-Semitism on our site to a minimum.

5 comments:

Tara Edwards said...

Kathryn is no doubt wanting to book the next flight back before you totally go off the deep end! It's nice of you to share your camera and computer though. It's amazing how you get used to having them in your life!

erin said...

the difference between when boys are left at home and when girls are left at home: those brownies would have been digested 5 days ago. since matt has been gone (wednesday) i've consumed almost an entire container of costco choco chip cookies. COSTCO, meaning the container is like the size of something that would need to be delivered to your apartment on a flatbed truck. you're a better person than i am.

k. said...

Thank you for justifying your margins on this post. :)

I sort of get a sick feeling in my stomach when I see these photos (& the one that you emailed me - gulp), but then I remember that you're probably really terrified of the stress-induced cleaning rampages that I often go on, so I'm sure that I'll find a perfectly tidy apartment by the time I get home. In the meantime, just go ahead - leave the shower curtain pulled all the way over when you're done. Sprinkle some protein all over the kitchen counter. Keep the toothpaste on the counter, because hey - you'll use it in another 12 hours. Leave the Wii remotes on the floor. Keep your sweaty gym clothes hanging on the doorknob (gross). Go crazy. :)

Love you!

Jan said...

You're a funny man! I think it's nice to break from the norm from time to time....Things will return to normal soon enough. Who cares, for now. Enjoy!

Lula. said...

you are so funny mike.