Morning: Happy!
Mid-morning / early afternoon: Sad, sad, sad. I get sad when I don't sleep, too.
Early evening: Sleepy (exhausted).
Friends again.
We'll call yesterday one of those one step back days that my pediatrician was referring to. I'll blame the rain.
The fussing started mid-morning after his refusal to nap, & it really didn't stop all day - except when I was at the end of my rope & finally put him in the Bjorn & walked laps around my grocery store for 45 minutes. More than once I caught myself soothing my shopping cart by rolling it back & forth only to remember that Q was in fact in the carrier, strapped to my chest. But, the walk did the trick & he was finally calmed - as was I.
Anyway. We survived, & I got some grocery shopping done in the meantime, but it was a long day, & not an especially glamorous one. I talked with a friend about some really exciting things happening in her career, & then Mike got home announcing that he'd won a large deal, & I... well. I spent my day getting yelled at in between breastfeeding, & I'm pretty sure that I had puke in my unwashed hair. But! I am mostly content with this. I can say that & mean it, even though I look out my window every day & I see this huge, giant city that I love, that I'm currently not exploring very much right now, & even if I feel just a teensy bit trapped these days because if my child doesn't sleep then ALL HELL BREAKS LOSE. So I stay home, often, for now - for the sake of my son. And like I said - I'm mostly, 94% content with this. We'll get out more often soon enough, & quick little outings keep us (mostly) sane in the meantime. And my friends & my husband are doing really great, amazing & exciting things while wearing clothes that are dry clean only & I'm so very proud of them. But for now, I won't be jealous.
And luckily - Q & I finally made up (after his forced Bjorn nap). I guess we're still friends. Poor guy. If I've learned anything about our little boy, it's that he needs his sleep, & when he doesn't get it - there's almost no turning back.
I did manage to be somewhat productive during his infrequent periods of calm, lest I have a day of accomplishing absolutely positively nothing. During the few short naps (20 minutes?) that he did take, I did what I typically do to cope: cleaned & organized. I worked through my to-do list as quickly as I could, cleaning out my fridge & my pantry, taking out the garbage & recycling, writing some thank you notes & throwing some ingredients into a crock pot & calling it dinner. Oh - & I managed to put some hummus on bread & called it lunch - around 3pm. Sigh. But! I accomplished just a few things, & even though my benchmark of success is most often just keeping my child warm & fed (+ me getting a shower), this made me feel happy-ish on what was a stressful day.
Q made up for it last night though! Our second night of only waking up once, with two huge stretches of sleep. Thank you, son. We've decided to keep you.
Today. I have that doctor's appointment. You know, the one where they check you out & tell you that you're free to do all sorts of things that you can't even possibly imagine doing. Six weeks! I can't believe it's been six weeks. It feels like an hour & a lifetime all at once. I wrote a note the other day to the doctor who delivered Quinn, & I'm still so grateful for her + the overall experience. We were treated well, & things went smoothly (although my only request is that Roosevelt Hospital hire a few more anesthesiologists for the L&D floor, please).
We're blessing Quinn on Sunday, & my parents get into town tomorrow which will be so very fun. For the weekend, plus some! Maybe we'll go for a leaf watching drive on Saturday? We don't have any big plans, except that Mike is taking me out to dinner Saturday night - without a diaper bag or a stroller or even a baby - & I'm excited.
6 comments:
You are so good with words, Kathryn. You have remembering what's it like to have a newborn... and seem to capture it all so perfectly (the reality of it & the love).
Yay for a night out with Mike!
I know this is unsolicited advice, but the #1 thing I learned (the hard way) with my boys is that if they get OVERLY-tired then they wouldn't nap, or would only nap for a short time. The trick is to get them to bed before they miss their sleep window. Easier said than done, I know, but I learned that my boys should never be awake more than 2 hours at a time until the age of 1. I loved the book, Good Night, Sleep Tight to help me with all of this.
Sorry, I know you weren't looking for any advice when you wrote this post, but I'm flooded with memories and emotion about my early first few months of motherhood...hardest time of my life.
You look fabulous and Quinn could not be anymore adorable! I hope the blessing weekend with your family goes well!
That two hour window rang true for me too, but it is hard to catch it I think! Tiny babies seriously go from happy and calm to suddenly TIRED in seconds I swear.
Sunday is the blessing? Oh! I am so excited to hear/see pics. Fun to have your mom back in town too. Where are you going on Saturday? That sounds great!
The first few months are trial and error. Before you know it, the hard days will be farther and farther apart. I hope.
I seriously can't believe how productive you are with a newborn. Teach me, please.
I'm impressed with your productivity too - you are doing so well, has it really only been six weeks?! So excited you bless Quinn on Sunday and hooray for parents - once you have your own child, your parents suddenly mean more than ever!
Julie, advice is totally welcome. And yup, I figured out the same thing (2 weeks too late). Poor guy can't stay up for longer than a hour & 15 minutes or so. But I keep missing his cues! This morning he went down with no tears, & that was a first in a few days... Do I just watch for the very first yawn, & then he's done?? So tricky... But the overtired thing. Yeah. Definitely an issue we've been trying to avoid, but it's so hard sometimes.
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