Mar 17, 2011

Who needs hair product when you have a baby (+ a little story about the dumbest thing I've ever done)?

Because Quinn just puked all over my freshly-washed hair, & it's got some really great texture now. I could do without the smell, & I really could have just skipped the sea salt spray I used this morning, but so it goes.

Today started out so well! Yesterday was one of those days where I did a thousand things (or maybe three, but it felt great!), none of which involved taking a shower. It was the first time in  months I'd gone without, but it just never happened despite my best intentions. So of course this morning, I took advantage of a sleeping baby & took a nice, long, hot shower. I blow dried my hair all the way (!) using the fancy new blowdryer that I finally invested in, put on makeup (for no reason other than just having the time + interest) & got dressed in clothes that I wouldn't be embarrassed to be at a restaurant in. We ran out for a few errands after Q's morning nap, including a stop at CVS for some of Neutrogena's great shampoo (which I always try to use once a week, especially since the water pressure in our shower resembles someone spitting on your head). It was only fitting that when we got home & I picked up a perfectly happy Q out of his stroller, that he decided to empty the breakfast that he'd eaten an hour earlier all over my hair & back. Thank you, son.

There is nothing that make you lose your vanity more quickly than having a baby.

Come to think of it, I guess I basically lost all pretense of having my act together months ago. Were any of you lucky enough to catch it when I posted my girlie bits on the internet for all of the world to see? If I'm ever a part of another What's your most embarrasing story? conversation again, I'm fairly confident that I'll win, because for several (at least eight) disastrous hours, there was a photo of me on this sweet little blog that was maybe not Rated R, but certainly PG-13. I partially blame the blur that is childbirth & having a new infant, & I partially blame my mother & husband who both looked at Quinn's birth post several times before I hit publish & should have known better than to let my sleep deprived + emotional + poor attention to detail self do any major posting on the internet. It wasn't until I got a phone call from my sister the next morning - who had gotten a panicked phone call from my brother! - that I knew what I had done.

Um, Kathryn. I'm really glad that you're so open & willing to share on your blog, but maybe you need to take down that photo? 

A very, very poorly cropped photo - or a photo that wasn't cropped at all, I should say, one that was taken just moments after Quinn made his entrance into the world, when I was wearing a lovely blue gown & holding my new son for the very first time... while the doctor was taking a quick break from finishing up her business down in my nether regions. Which you could see.

Oops.

Anyway. I was initially horrified, but that quickly turned to general ambivalence. What was I to do at that point (besides crop the photo & re-post, of course)? And besides, after a half dozen pelvic exams the week that Quinn was born (after 9 months of pregnancy), running around the labor & delivery triage pants-less + in a general panic at the ridiculous contracts that caused my water to break (in front of several sweet nurses, which was a disgusting experience in & of itself), & then finally actually giving birth - I guess I was just over it. I could do absolutely nothing about the fact that my StatCounter showed several hundred hits on that post within those hours & only hoped that people were drawn to Quinn's sweet little face in that photo just as I had obviously been.

Oh. And if you're my friend & you saw this & you didn't tell me & I find out about this, then we're probably in a fight. I'm the kind of friend who tells people when they have food in their teeth. I expect the same! 

Anyway. Motherhood. It's a beautiful thing - even if it means naked internet photos + smelling like throw up. 

(A few thoroughly unrelated photos, except to show that he is in fact worth it all.)



12 comments:

Whitney said...

Sometimes in life, you just have to laugh! This is funny. Seriously! I can honestly tell you, I had no idea about the photo. As a new mother my self, I'm not really phased (and don't notice) boobs and down under anymore. :) I'm glad you can laugh about it now.

Jan said...

I have no idea about the photo either - and I'm supposed to take some kind of responsibility? Oh so sorry to have missed something like that - I certainly did not notice. Everything I saw those first few days was just miraculousl to me.....Beautiful you, proud daddy, darling baby. The rest was just unnoticed and unimportant.

Jill said...

What?!! When did this happen? I have no memory of this story, nor any recollection of seeing your lady parts.

erin said...

hi. girlie bits is a great term that needs to be used more often.

and i love this story. if your picture is as bas as you say it was, which i'm gonna guess that it wasn't, i am certain that it doesn't even come close to that 'breastfeeding is beautiful' blog we checked out a while ago.

Jill said...

Ack! I can only imagine your horror. I can testify that I saw nothing embarrassing, just you & Quinn. Don't worry, done and done, and only your brother panicked. :)

Tara said...

That was one of the hardest phone calls to make! On one hand, I knew I had to call you, and on the other hand, I knew that you would die! Which is why Patrick unloaded that responsibility to me I suppose. It was pretty funny, and not so obvious that anyone who wasn't paying attention to every detail of every picture might notice!

Meg said...

Even though you've told me this, I totally don't remember it! Let's give the world the benefit of the doubt that we were all looking at Q's sweet face. Although the story definitely is a hands down winner for "most OMG moment EVER." I'm never playing you in that game.

Missy said...

I don't remember it either! I'm guessing most people were looking at Q and the fact that you looked so pretty right after labor + delivery.

Mandy said...

I completely missed the photo, but that is hilarious! Maybe the funniest part of the story though is that Pat didn't call you first! Ha ha! I laughed out loud.

Amy said...

Didn't see it! I definitely would have told you. Glad you can laugh about it now. =)

Heidi said...

I don't recall any embarrassing photos on here, I'm pretty sure I would have remembered that. I guess that is what brothers and sisters are for.

Jeanne said...

Somehow my phone was still on this page and i remembered i hadnt left a comment. What a story. I also somehow missed the picture. I just remember beautiful pictures of a perfectly coiffed mom with makeup in tact and glowing postpartum happiness, with the most amazingly beautiful son, swaddled and angelic. We must have been on the way to and at the hospital during those eight hours. It was a miraculous day for us and we have nothing but beautiful memories.